Excuse me, are you listening? 9-26
Sunday, January 16, 2011

Dear Readers,

Even though we may remove ourselves from certain negative situations  the internal damage may not be resolved.  It takes more than a two weeks vacation or a three month break-up to deal with hurt and disappointment.  For the record, this is for both men and women.  While you may see more women attempting to expertly apply make-up and beautify themselves with clothes that cost too much, trying to impress or deny goes both ways.  Men express the same feelings towards a faster car, a bigger truck and stronger body.  Just making a point so that the men do not just think this is only a woman's issue.

Reality sets in when you think about how this world could possibly be if we just loved and trusted a little more.  I have sort of a theory that there are more men in jail because we add layers of pressure when we tell them as boys to not cry, when they really would like to.  I wonder how a man re-shapes his life if he believed that being a man meant you had to be strong all the time and you had to have the top job in the company.  Why would not a woman want a "nice" guy, who is just nice? It seems so logical but we have a hard time acknowledging that sometimes we need help.

Some times that hurt and disappointment can impact the way you live.  No one can tell you what your breaking point is.  At some point you will need to talk to someone.  I would say preferably in a private and nonjudgemental environment.  Sometimes "friends" or acquaintances only see you an hour or two a week out of the 168 hours that we are allotted in our week and think they know you well.  They have no real clue what goes on during the time you are choosing to have "me" time or  "I want to be by myself time".  We are not even going to discuss the thousands of hours you spent on this earth prior to meeting them.   Everyone has certain aspects of their life that they like and dislike.  I becomes a problem when you don't recognize your own worth.  Low self-esteem, guilt, confusion, depression, anxiety, fear and sometimes even joy makes life very complicated.

If any of what I wrote above slightly rings a bell with you, pursing another path in your life may be prudent.  A bit of stretching out and knowing yourself will make you feel better even if it initially it is extremely uncomfortable.  Change is very unnerving.   That extra distress of not knowing what the future holds begins to cause you concern.  It would be sensible to make changes and the sooner you start, the easier it will be.

Please allow  forgiveness and absolution regardless of it is focused on yourself or on someone else.   Sometimes the past is like a weigh hanging around your neck. Remember to breathe deeply, slowly bend your knees while your feet are planted firmly on the floor, begin to bend your head slowly and what seemed to be so heavy may rest lightly on the floor.  What ever method you use to soothe the pain of the weight,  think about the fact that you have taken the first step and it takes time to heal.  Think about what you can do for yourself as you work on the aftermath because no matter what, you are really the only one that can change your life. Love the body and soul that you are in because it is counting on you.


Rina Risper


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