Interpersonal Edge: The math of goal setting
Sunday, June 26, 2016
By Dr. Daneen Skube
Tribune Content Agency
 
Q. I feel like I'm getting nowhere in my career. I work hard, show up every day and still don't get ahead. I am trying to figure out what I need to learn to make this the year I have a career break through. How can I improve my goal setting so I'm satisfied with my progress this year?
 
  A. You will definitely get ahead if you realize there is a mathematical formula to goal setting. It goes like this: Problem solving plus X equals outcome. The critical part of this formula is you have to actually start where you want to end up! When you can see your outcome, the "X" in this formula are the steps you need to take.
 
  A helpful exercise I use with my clients is for them to imagine they are time travelers. Take yourself to the point in time where you have made "progress" in your career. Now closely examine that video. What do you see, who is around you, what do you smell, and what is going on? Pay attention to the differences between your preferred future and your present reality.
 
  Once you've answered the million dollar question about where you want to end up, you can effectively plan to arrive at your destination. Realize that many people run around vaguely dissatisfied with where they are, but they mostly focus on what they don't want. No one can effectively set goals when they are obsessing about their current problems.
 
  Unfortunately, we can find it satisfying to vent about our current problems without noticing that all that energy could be used more effectively in changing our circumstances. When you can see where you want to end up, you can then work backwards on the numerous steps that will land you in that exact future.
 
  Our futures are mostly carved out of what we think about the most. If we think about problems, we are miserable. If we focus on finding solutions, we get ahead.
 
  Never underestimate the power of a clear, tangible vision of your ideal future. When you can see, smell and feel what you want, you'll have confidence that it's possible for you to achieve.
 
  Let's use an example of your new math formula: Problem solving plus X equals a promotion. When you work backwards you can see "X" will include more meetings with boss, visibility with management and taking the lead on projects. Notice that no amount of complaining will ever get you to that effective action plan.
 
  When we are unhappy, we focus on pity. When we focus on our goals, we have power. You cannot have pity and power at the same time. Next time you feel frustrated, jump to your outcome and work backwards to get the progress you deserve. 
 
  The last word(s)
 
  Q. My coworker never focuses on details and I always have to double check their work. Is there a way to stop doing his work?
 
  A.  Yes, stop doing his work. If you stop picking up his pieces, your boss will finally notice there is a problem.
Daneen Skube, Ph.D., executive coach, trainer, therapist and speaker, also appears as the FOX Channel's "Workplace Guru" each Monday morning. She's the author of "Interpersonal Edge: Breakthrough Tools for Talking to Anyone, Anywhere, About Anything" (Hay House, 2006). You can contact Dr. Skube at www.interpersonaledge.com or 1420 NW Gilman Blvd., #2845, Issaquah, WA 98027. Sorry, no personal replies.
 
This column was printed in the June 26, 2016 - July 9, 2016 edition.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
By Dr. Daneen Skube
Tribune Content Agency
 
Q. I feel like I'm getting nowhere in my career. I work hard, show up every day and still don't get ahead. I am trying to figure out what I need to learn to make this the year I have a career break through. How can I improve my goal setting so I'm satisfied with my progress this year?
 
  A. You will definitely get ahead if you realize there is a mathematical formula to goal setting. It goes like this: Problem solving plus X equals outcome. The critical part of this formula is you have to actually start where you want to end up! When you can see your outcome, the "X" in this formula are the steps you need to take.
 
  A helpful exercise I use with my clients is for them to imagine they are time travelers. Take yourself to the point in time where you have made "progress" in your career. Now closely examine that video. What do you see, who is around you, what do you smell, and what is going on? Pay attention to the differences between your preferred future and your present reality.
 
  Once you've answered the million dollar question about where you want to end up, you can effectively plan to arrive at your destination. Realize that many people run around vaguely dissatisfied with where they are, but they mostly focus on what they don't want. No one can effectively set goals when they are obsessing about their current problems.
 
  Unfortunately, we can find it satisfying to vent about our current problems without noticing that all that energy could be used more effectively in changing our circumstances. When you can see where you want to end up, you can then work backwards on the numerous steps that will land you in that exact future.
 
  Our futures are mostly carved out of what we think about the most. If we think about problems, we are miserable. If we focus on finding solutions, we get ahead.
 
  Never underestimate the power of a clear, tangible vision of your ideal future. When you can see, smell and feel what you want, you'll have confidence that it's possible for you to achieve.
 
  Let's use an example of your new math formula: Problem solving plus X equals a promotion. When you work backwards you can see "X" will include more meetings with boss, visibility with management and taking the lead on projects. Notice that no amount of complaining will ever get you to that effective action plan.
 
  When we are unhappy, we focus on pity. When we focus on our goals, we have power. You cannot have pity and power at the same time. Next time you feel frustrated, jump to your outcome and work backwards to get the progress you deserve. 
 
  
 
  The last word(s)
 
  Q. My coworker never focuses on details and I always have to double check their work. Is there a way to stop doing his work?
 
  A.  Yes, stop doing his work. If you stop picking up his pieces, your boss will finally notice there is a problem.

Daneen Skube, Ph.D., executive coach, trainer, therapist and speaker, also appears as the FOX Channel's "Workplace Guru" each Monday morning. She's the author of "Interpersonal Edge: Breakthrough Tools for Talking to Anyone, Anywhere, About Anything" (Hay House, 2006). You can contact Dr. Skube at www.interpersonaledge.com or 1420 NW Gilman Blvd., #2845, Issaquah, WA 98027. Sorry, no personal replies.This column was printed in the June 26, 2016 - July 9, 2016

 

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